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E-Question: Not being in a relationship, what makes you feel strong and what makes you feel weak?

Send your response to Gregg Millett

Responses:

I feel weak when I want to take a trip and realize that "singles" have to pay a single supplement to participate - or take a chance on an unknown roommate.

I feel strong knowing that I am managing on my own

I feel weak when I realize that I am being "taken" by tradespeople (carpenters, plumbers, roofers, etc.), because they automatically quote higher estimates to single women.

I feel weak when my mother considers my life a failure because I don't have a mate

I feel stronger when I am not in a relationship because I don't have anyone
criticizing me, telling me what I should or shouldn't do, etc.

I tend to feel weak when I have trouble making decisions.

Feel strong when I'm in a familiar situation and I am comfortable with anything or questions that might arise. I guess when I feel in control of myself.

Feel weak on the opposite scenario -- when I'm in a new situation, or
am not sure what to expect or how things might go -- when thrust into a
situation I hadn't expected or been in before. I don't know as weak
would be exactly the correct term though.

As far as how it feels not to be in a relationship, for myself it makes me
feel strong and happy. I am just coming out of a two year relationship,
where the other person was extremely critical much of the time of everything
I did, which made me feel extremely weak. I now feel strong and am enjoying
making my own decisions about everything I do. I also feel strong realizing
that I only need myself to go out and have a good time. I do not have to be
in a relationship to enjoy life. The person I was in a relationship was very controlling and domineering. I would have to say he was self-centered, as he would say "I'm going to go
here or there on Saturday night". I don't think he had a clue. I would then usually say "Have a good time I'll see you". He would then say "your going too". Never would he say "Would you like to go here or there". When all is said and done I have returned to my life-time belief that life is what you make it.

In not being in a relationship I feel very strong in that I am able to hold on to my principals and self esteem by not lowering my standards for my choices in a relationship.

I feel strong in that I have great feelings come alive when I think of all that I do and can still accomplish much more all of which I do by myself. I feel strong in myself knowing that I made every effort to study the great qualities necessary for having a successful relationship.

I feel strong because I can do what I want when I want. ( I am my own
man!).

My feelings of weakness takes over when I get self doubt as to why I am not in a romantic relationship. I feel weak when negative thoughts make me question myself. I feel weak when I try to do something strenuous and don't have a man to help me. I feel weak when I worry about the years ticking by and wonder will I ever find true love again. I feel weak when I think of how special I am but, have no romantic relationship in my life.

Not being in a relationship in and of itself makes me feel weak sometimes
because there is no one to share life's burdens, no one to cuddle.

What makes me strong is my own self esteem and sense of self worth. I'm grateful that I have the courage within me, and the knowledge that I am worthwhile, that I am desireable, and the world is just full of men who don't recognize it or appreciate it. It's their loss! I don't sit around feeling sorry for myself. I feel sorry for them because they could be enjoying a wonderful relationship with a strong, passionate woman! The right one will come along one day, until them, my life is full.

Strong - Being in control of myself during a "life situation."

Weak - Feeling that I need to ask for help with chores or tasks -- I like to feel that I can do things without the aid of others.

I like the freedom to think about life options without having to think about a partner. I like the freedom of exploring social options without restraint. Being impulsive, both of these feelings of strength can get me into trouble -- which can be viewed as a weakness.

The times when I was not in a relationship, I was pretty much the same as I am now. The only difference being the times when loneliness would set in and in those times you simply made your self busy, or tried to anyway. I don't feel I have any strengths or weaknesses different whether in or out of a relationship....why change who you are or your personality?
I do feel I have a greater sense of purpose, strength if you wish to call it that in my relationship however because I have someone to do and care for.

Not being in a relationship for me my weakness I guess was occasional loneliness and also not having someone special to share conversations, etc. with.

My strength was being totally and completely independent. Whereas within my relationship I'm still independent to a point but compromises are made at times.

What made me weak before was not being able to say no to my eldest daughter when she would ask me to babysit my little grandson. But now, I do say no if I don't feel like it.

My strenghth has always been my independence. I don't want anyone telling me how to run my life. If and when I do make a mistake, I will pay the consequences. The age I'm at, I don't need anyone's advice about what I should do with my life unless I ask for it.

Being single it's relatively easy to speak from this standpoint My times of weak are when I'm feeling overwhelmed by the many issues surrounded by raising children (one in his teens) on my own and having nowhere to lean.

My times of strength are when I wake up to another day with a clear mind after a good night's rest.

It is strange to think about weakness and strength, since I am not single by choice (Oh for the luxury of being the dumper instead of the dumpee). I am getting further in my career than I did when I had to pay attention to a family. I work 18 hour days non stop.
I guess the weakness is I do all these amazing things and work with the most talented people on earth and have no one to share it with (you know the feeling on Christmas morning, you get that special toy and you run outside to show your friends...your real friends...and isn't that the most urgent part of being married? always having a friend to share life's up and downs with). Sometimes I wish I could go back to the selfish unfeeling
womanizer I was in the 70s when I was touring all the time, but I've tasted real love and it is pointless to turn back.

My strength comes from knowing iIcan support myself and make sound independent decisions.

On the weak side, I sometimes find it difficult to socialize in a couple oriented venue. Being on the shy side I will avoid gatherings that are primarily couple oriented.

Weakness : having to make all decisions myself.

Strength : making the right decisions.

Weakness......Having to be both mom and dad....Having to make decisions without anothe'rs input. I would avoid couple orientated situations..and that can make evenings very lonely.

Strengths...Knowing that I can do it..I can support myself.....I can do it alone!

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