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Personality Styles that Click
and Clash First we asked -- If you could pick one word that is central to your
personality, what word would you choose? Go ahead and write down a word
and see how it compares to others' responses ____________________. Imagine how many dimensions there are to being and how many ways there are to describe personality! Also notice the words that draw you closer and those that distance you. Second we asked -- Would you describe yourself as an introvert or extrovert
(shy or outgoing; gain or expend energy when socializing)? And do you
feel you click or clash with similar or opposite types on this dimension
of personality? There were several perspectives on this: Next we asked -- Do you think you are more a feeling type or a thinking type (head or heart centered) and what do you think about type click and clash? All of the above perspectives are also relevant here. Another very interesting perspective was offered, namely an out-of-body experience! Have you ever been in a situation where your opposite type kicked in? For example, you were at an accident where you jumped into action using all the logic and problem-solving skills you have to help with a critical situation. Afterwards you break down and sob. Or, you are at a play or movie, where the power of the actors and the plot makes you laugh or cry and then later you analyze and contemplate the story. If it's your opposite type kicking in, when you look back on it, it seems a bit like an out-of-body experience. Imagine how different you would be if the opposite type was your main mode of functioning. Finally we considered the following thirteen personality styles: Participants were asked to identify their main style and to choose the styles that they most clicked and clashed with. The styles selected by most people were conscientious, vigilant, and adventurous. In the middle were sensitive and devoted. No one chose dramatic, leisurely, mercurial or aggressive. The styles most chosen as compatible were devoted, self-confident and conscientious. There was some question about devoted as a doormat! The styles most incompatible were aggressive and mercurial. We closed with a twist. These personality styles come from the book Personality
Self-Portrait by John Oldham and Lois Morris. The styles are generated
as the logical positive sides of major personality disorders! Here are
the flip sides: Final Thought: Maybe in the above contrasts you see a clue to Fatal Attractions as well as a shadow side of yourself that gets you into trouble. If you'd like more information on these styles click on this link: More E-Question Responses: Those are hard choices! I guess I am dramatic, though I'm not always the life of the party (I can be quite shy at times). I do best with someone leisurely because I love a sense of humor, can't stand possessive or bitter people, or temperamental people always scrappin' for conflict. I am least compatible with a loner. I was also thinking idiosyncratic, but a little bit of an oddball is OK, even interesting. I believe I am - Devoted or Conscientious and click with - Conscientious or Sensitive and Clash with - Aggressive or Leisurely. |
E-Question: Consider
the following personality styles: I guess I most closely relate to the Self-Sacrificing (though some have called my decision not to have children very selfish), and I have the most trouble with Aggressive, Solitary, Leisurely types... a little of each is a nice mix, but too much of any of these traits and I'm running away. If I knew what my best match was, I guess I'd have found him! I like a man who enjoys being together, is incredibly affectionate, passionate, has goals, but doesn't come across as needy or too self-indulgent. I'm not sure what my best match is. I know he has to be absolutely Devoted, but that alone is not enough. I'm a conscientious type who does best with a devoted person and who does worst with an aggressive one. I am concerned that we are putting ourselves in boxes devised by who knows and then limiting ourselves to them I am happy as me, somewhere outside the boxes and not looking especially for anyone to combine their boxes but if lightening strikes and it happens, OK. I'm conscientious, self-confident, devoted, sensitive
and have been attracted to: Hmm… this is difficult for me. I would say I am a cross between Vigilant/Idiosyncratic/Solitary and would probably do well with Sensitive/Idiosyncratic. Don't really know… haven't matched well with anyone as yet! I'm the adventurous type -- challenging the world, but hopefully not rubbing my partner the wrong way. I get along best with the conscientious type, and least with the fire and ice type. I'm more Sensitive. I would probably do best with Conscientious and not do so well with Aggressive. I am Vigilant and do best with devoted and worst with aggressive. I think I'm a Sensitive and my Teddy bear is Devoted. I've looked this over several times and think it's hard
to nail it down to one personality, but I am probably.....Sensitive and
attracted to the adventurous type. I don't think I do well with aggressive
or fire and ice types of personalities. I'm Devoted - The Good Mate and most click with Sensitive - The Homebody and most clash with Aggressive - Top Dog. I'm Devoted and Sensitive and best click with....conscientious
and devoted I believe that I am Vigilant, click best with the Adventurer
and clash most with the Dramatic. I am Mercurial -- Fire and Ice, not in terms of anger
or ups and downs, but as in Fire = Passion and Ice = calming, caring.
I would clash with Self-Sacrificing -- The Altruist, Aggressive -- Top
Dog and Dramatic -- The Life of the Party. I'm conscientious, click best with devoted, and worst with anyone who insists on talking about themselves and their accomplishments, real or not. I don't see anything on the list that quite typifies that, so I'm guessing the best choice would be aggressive. I would have to say I'm very devoted but I have a hint
of Vigilant in there also. I'm a good mate and a survivor though I haven't
ever figured out what's wrong in that combination. I don't mesh well with
the Aggressive -- Top Dog -- they just never trip my trigger. I would
have to say that I mesh well with...Adventurous -- The Challenger, because
that just seems to get me out of my rut every now and then. |